Jude Smith

I did something brave this week. My friends tell me it was brave. And yet it didn’t fit the image of bravery that perhaps we all hold in our minds (I didn’t jump in front of a car to save a pet meerkat or anything like that). What I did I think I may have only done once before- and given that I’m not quite ready to tell what I did this week I will tell you about the previous incident. It was about 17 years ago- on a street in downtown Johannesburg. I was walking with a friend and suddenly I was aware of people a little too close. Someone suddenly placed their hand on my bag. I tugged a little to get it back. And then I glanced down and noticed a grubby blade pointed at my belly. I glanced up and noted a knife at the throat of my friend. * an aside* At this point there is a Hollywood plot that still emerges in my head: one where I kicked the knife out of the hand of the assailants, pushed them to the floor and ran off. There is a redeemed version where David Wilkerson styl...

I had the privilege of preaching at Chapel A on Sunday. Here are the rough scribblings of what I said, loosely based around the theme of Jesus the teacher. I went home a few weeks ago, back to my parents house.. They presented me with two large boxes from their loft. They were triumphant that these were the last of my belongings that were cluttering up their home. And in these boxes I found, amongst other things, these.. (show exercise books) I threw away most of my school books a few years ago, but these were important because these were in subjects that I went on to teach.. And as I sat and had a look at these books I was struck by memories of particular teachers- rather than the notes of what they taught. I wonder if I were to ask you what you learned when you were 14 if you would remember.. But I bet you could tell me your teachers and what they were like. Are we more influenced by the teaching or the teacher? Thats kind of what I want to journey with this morning as ...

I posted just a couple of weeks ago about 39 steps before I am 40. And I have to say that its going alright thus far- and without wanting to sound too cheesy there is a real sense that God is at work in some of these things: some examples follow. I sat with a potential piano teacher who has pointed me to some really beautiful worship music. Lessons start in a couple of weeks where I will learn to play by ear (over time and with practice). I'm booked in to teach at a university. I have a friend who is going to teach me to mix curry spices in a couple of weeks. I've done something that scares me (which may or may not have been the same as going on a date). Other things are harder to get going: I am struggling to be social media free. I have drafted a letter and not sent it. And it keeps snowing so I am a bit behind on my travel! But I'm enjoying it.. and do send suggestions for other things my way!

Over the last few weeks I have been pondering what I should give up and take up for Lent. It has finally crystallized today. There is a lots going on for me just now- but I can't use that as an excuse. I can be desperately inattentive- I can be thinking about what is next or has just been, and can be texting, tweeting or anything while I am actually present with real people. So- my Lent resolve is to be where I am. I am giving up multitasking. So when I am with you I will be with you, not on something else. It will mean giving up some habits, it will mean my phone battery lasts longer- But I hope it means I will be where I am.. I look forward to seeing you there.

At the end of my last post I prayed, show me Lord how to fight. I meant it. As I tapped away at my keyboard last night, with every comma and alliterative device I was aware that I was putting my head above an enormous and intimidating parapet. For much as I talk of fighting, I have little energy, fewer ideas and not much will. I feel hypocritical and exposed. However, as some of you will know, during my curacy I have lost almost six stone in weight. At the start of that journey too I had little idea of what I was doing and very little will power. But going public with my intention helped. Keeping a record of what I was doing also helped. And so in that spirit, here is a record of how I have learned to fight today. It ran like this- for the first time in nine months I didn't have a communion at lunchtime to head off to after morning prayers. It freed up a two hour window where I had a choice. And for once I chose to get out from behind my desk and go and see people. ...

(Wrote this late last night- and I still think it this morning so I share with you). Today I changed a little bit of postcard artwork in my house. It now has an amusing vicar card on it with a greeting from a friend. I have a card on that particular door because underneath it bears the fist mark of my frustration. A mere six hours before I reached resolution on a really tough moment in my curacy, I lost it. At the door. When I move I will offer recompense for the damage- or perhaps suggest that they keep it in that state as a warning to future curates. Why am I telling you this? Well fighting inanimate things is somewhat of an occupational hazard in the church. I listened today to an interview with Justin Welby where he again and again was trying to say that there are issues more important than the ones we tie ourselves in knots about. I listened to that interview on the way home from the gym- pulling up on the drive to find the used needle van parked up. As I came into t...

Yesterday I turned 39. Yes, in a years time I will be forty. And there are some things that I would like to get in place before I hit that particular landmark. And so in the year up to my fortieth birthday I will be taking 39 steps towards the second half of life. Some are big, others less so, but my hope is that they will all join in some kind of celebration at the end. So here they are 1- to create a piece of art that will be displayed in my home 2- to write a letter each month, to a person who has inspired me. 3- to learn to play a few tunes on piano 4- to teach at a university 5- to read a book by authors a-z through the year (so 26 books over the course of the year) 6- to finish my masters degree. 7- to learn to cook a really good curry 8- to travel the Leeds- Liverpool canal (manner to be determined) 9- to go on at least one date 10- to take a social media free day each week. 11- to see a live sporting event in Leeds 12- to buy and wear with confidence something...